There has been a secret in our family…one, in fact, that my birth family has risked life and limb and their very souls to keep from coming to light. My Father almost died by his own hand because of it. My Mother tried to put curses on me and my children because of it. My family moved away from my home town to a remote area a six-hour drive away because of it. My sister has moved halfway around the world because of it.
My birth family attempted to use my precious children to continue the persecution that this secret represented. They were targeted from birth, it seemed. At the time, there appeared to be little I could do to prevent it.
But Gd in his great mercy finds a way to use even the most horrible situations for good. All of this is beyond our earthly comprehension. As I watched the consequences of my birth family’s predatory treatment of my children, my heart was breaking and my soul was seared with almost incomprehensible grief. But the Lrd was telling me to “Rejoice!” How could I possibly do this, I wondered. And yet, I did my best to make a sacrifice of praise of what I could not understand.
But now, this year, this Mother’s Day (which also happens to be my birthday) I do have an answer, and it has been worth the wait.
The Lrd has used all the tumult of my childrens’ relationships with my birth family to get the secret out into the light. The secret itself — my birth family attempted to put a ‘mark’ on me. This was done in stealth and deceit, through systematic intermittent poisoning. The goal was to make sure that, even with this great gift of die zauberflote, I would have no alternative but to doubt Gd. I was supposed to believe I did not have His favor, but they did. I was supposed to believe I was not ‘good’ enough to go to Heaven, but they were.
My birth family treated me as though I was already dead and waited for something to happen. What did happen was that Gd has turned our family upside down.
And there has been a great concept at work here. Children cannot lie to their Mother, even if they wish. Children always tell the truth to one who loves them, through their word and action.
My children are of no more use to you, “Starla.” 🙂
*M4B=Mozart For Believers